How to Find Your People in Vet School (And Why It Actually Matters)

Your cohort is about to become your family. Not in the forced, awkward "we're stuck together" way. In the real way. The way where you study together at midnight, cry together after a brutal exam, celebrate the small wins together, and genuinely care if the other person makes it through. This is going to matter more than any course or grade.

But here's the thing everyone learns the hard way: not everyone in your cohort will be your people. Some will annoy you. Some will compete with you instead of collaborate with you. Some will disappear when things get hard and some are all about drama and you do not have time for that. Your job isn't to be friends with everyone. Your job is to find the ones who won't.

Say yes to everything the first week. Orientation activities that sound boring? Say yes anyway. Study groups with random people you don't know? Say yes. That coffee date someone suggests? Say yes. You'll figure out who your actual people are way faster if you're in a bunch of different situations with different combinations of people. Some friendships will fizzle. Others will become lifelong.

Look for the people who are being honest about how hard this is. Here's the secret about first year vet school: a lot of people are going to pretend they're crushing it. They got the highest score on the anatomy exam. They're totally fine with the workload. They love studying all day. They're going to tell you they barely study and still do great.

They're lying.

The real ones—the people you actually want in your life—are the ones who will tell you the truth. "I cried in the bathroom after that exam." "I have absolutely no idea what's going on." "This is so much harder than I thought it would be." "I don't know if I can do this." Find these people. They're your crew. They're the ones who will sit with you on the hard days and actually understand what you're going through.

Find study partners who vibe with your energy. You're going to spend a lot of time with these people—more time than you spend with most people in your life. You need to actually like being around them. You need them to keep you accountable AND laugh with you at 2 AM when everything feels impossible. If someone makes studying feel like a chore instead of a lifeline, they're not your person.

Join at least one club or group that has nothing to do with vet school. This is non-negotiable. You need an escape. You need something that reminds you that you're a whole human being outside of anatomy and pharmacology and board exam prep. Whether it's a hobby club, a sports league, a volunteer organization, or a running group—find something. Your mental health depends on it.

Don't force friendships. Not everyone will click. And that's completely fine. You don't need to be friends with everyone. You need a quality crew of people who actually get you. Five real friends are worth more than fifty surface-level connections.

Pay attention to people who look like they're struggling. Notice who's sitting alone at lunch. Notice who doesn't show up to study group for a week. Notice who's quiet in class. That's when you reach out. "Hey, how are you actually doing?" You'd be amazed at what happens when you ask that question and actually listen to the answer. This is how real friendships are built. This is also how you build a cohort culture where people actually show up for each other instead of competing.

Why This Matters

First year vet school is the hardest year of your entire career. You're going to have days when you genuinely don't think you can do this. Days when you want to quit. Days when you feel completely alone and like everyone else has it figured out and you're the only one falling apart.

“I hated vet school and even thought about quitting,” says Dr. Jill Lopez, founder of Vet Candy, “Then I found my group and something about our vibe helped me go from barely passing my classes in first year to being on the deans list the other three years. Your support group matters that much!”

That's where your people come in. The ones who text you at 2 AM because they're panicking too. The ones who know exactly how you're feeling because they're feeling it too. The ones who remind you that you're not the only one drowning. Your cohort is your lifeline. Invest in it. Be real with it. Let people in. And be the person who shows up for other people when they're struggling.